How to Handle Job Search Rejection
Job search lessons learned from “He’s Just Not That Into You”
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Breaking up sucks. No matter when it comes, no matter what the circumstances, no one wants to feel rejected or unwanted. Other than a terrible first date, there isn’t much worse than building yourself up for the thrill of starting a new job, only to be told by an employer that they just aren’t interested. They might give you official notice that they’re not interested, or they might not tell you anything at all. Sometimes you’ll have to break out your copy of relationship book “He’s Just Not That Into You” to decipher the code.
Chapter 1: “He’s just not that into you if he’s not asking you out.”
Translation: You applied, they didn’t call.
You’ve sent out all the signals to let them know you’re interested: you applied online, wrote an awesome cover letter, everything. They’re just not picking up on your signals, and you’re not sure why they haven’t called you back. Sorry, you aren’t what they’re looking for. It’s okay. There are a lot of fish in the sea! But this particular fish just isn’t that into you.
Chapter 8: “He’s just not that into you if he’s breaking up with you.”
Translation: They said they would keep your application on file – six months ago.
They’re not lying to you; some states require employers to keep your application on file. But unless unemployment is very low, they probably won’t ever look at it again. Employers receive tons of applications every single day. When unemployment is high, most employers won’t look back farther than a few weeks, so digging into their application archives just isn’t practical. It’s just a nice way for them to let you down without hurting your feelings. If your application went into the file cabinet several months ago and you haven’t heard anything, they’re just not that into you.
Chapter 9: “He’s just not that into you if he’s disappeared on you.”
Translation: You interviewed, they didn’t call.
You had your first interview, and it was great. You wore your favorite outfit and you had great chemistry with the interviewer, but now they aren’t calling you back. It happens to the best of us. Sometimes they just don’t feel the spark, or maybe they were looking around and found a better match. Give it a couple of weeks, but if the company hasn’t called you back, they’re just not that into you.
Chapter 10: “He’s just not that into you if he’s married (and other insane variations of being unavailable).”
Translation: Are they really even hiring?
Sometimes employers like to play it safe and put up a “Help Wanted” sign when they don’t have a position open at the moment. It’s hard for them to know when someone will quit or get fired, so they want to be sure to have an application waiting when a position becomes open. This is called proactive hiring, and it’s a little like dating around. They want to keep it casual and explore their options. They may call you when you least expect it! But if all signs should be pointing to “yes” and their answer is still “no,” then they’re just not that into you.
Chapter 12: “Don’t listen to these stories.”
Translation: You never know what might happen…
So maybe you’re thinking, “But I know someone who did get the job when an employer put their application ‘on file.’” That might very well be true, but that makes them the exception, not the rule. While it’s possible that you’ll get a call out of the blue months after you apply, don’t expect it. Just like “He’s Just Not That Into You” says, “you’re exceptional, but not the exception!!”
Chapter 13: “Now what do you do?”
Translation: Don’t give up on your job search.
Just like after any failed relationship, you’ve got to get back out there. You can’t afford to wallow in self-pity about a job that just wasn’t a good fit. You’ve got to keep looking, and eventually, you’ll find a job you can settle down with!